Tuesday, May 23, 2006

A Pain in the Backside

Today was bone marrow biopsy day.......oh joy!

It went something like this.........

A little waiting around
A little time spent finding a suitable vein for the cannula
A little more waiting, enlivened by the perusal of property porn in the form of last week's 'Country Life'.
(I presume this magazine must actually be read by people who are not waiting for unpleasant medical procedures, but, I must confess, I associate it only with the scent of disinfectant and, its eternal waiting room companion, 'The People's Friend')


Then finally into a side room, lay down, have 10ml of something or other injected via the cannula and then wake up an hour and a half later with a large plaster on my behind.



NB:
I'm not sure what language the label on this diagram is in but I can nonetheless offer the following rough translation:

OOUCCHH!



Regrettably your roving reporter forgot to take his camera on this occasion, thus the need for international pictorial assistance. I must also report that my opportunities for candid shots are likely to be limited now, as Saint Lymphoma's doctors and nurses have been seen taking sneaky peeks at this bulletin since it's online publication, and some of them may not want to be featured in all their glory (or in their uniforms - thank you, Kavi) - I shall just have to be more cunning in future!

Bone marrow samples normally take around a week to analyse apparently, so the results should be available at my appointment with Le Grand Fromage on 2nd June.

So, having been sedated, speared, then woken and given the obligatory cup of tea, I was driven home by Jessica and went back to sleep for a couple of hours as I was still feeling a little drowsy from the anaesthetic.

I was woken up by Morgan who had done a fine drawing of a snake for me - see below - which I must confess I struggled to appreciate as much as I might have because of the rather large ache coming from my rear. This has now subsided somewhat and, if I remember correctly, should be gone in two or three days.
I hope so!


I've been feeling much better over the last week than I have for a long time. Having apparently reached the end of this phase of chemo, I can at last take control over my life, and my body, again.

I've been out for a couple of walks/runs and been swimming and I can't tell you how fantastic it feels just to be able to do those kind of things again, not to mention taking a more active role with Morgan . Obviously my fitness is not what it was, (in fact it's terrible!) but at least I know I'm not going to be poisoned again next week, and that means I can actually take some exercise and start trying to get back to the level I was at in December before all this landed upon me.

So, no more appointments now until the CT scan on the 1st June, .......and then....... the crunch.




Whilst searching for suitable images to accompany this post, I came across the following tempting looking orange button offering the opportunity to watch a free demonstration video. Given that I'd done an image search using the term 'bone marrow biopsy', I was a little surprised to find this on the first page of my results!

Well, I just had to have a look didn't I?

Wouldn't you?

What do you know! You can train to perform a bone marrow biopsy yourself online. Wow! Is there no end to what you can do with technology these days?
I will, of course, be visiting http://proficientprocedures.com to avail myself of this great opportunity, so that next time I'll be able to do the job myself - with the aid of a knitting needle, a mirror and a large bottle of whisky.

Alternatively, if you have a 'medical procedure' coming up yourself why not do as they suggest!!?!

Or not..........







More anon when the shit hits the fan...................................................................................................




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